


the bluebirds flutter in my chest

by icymuze



Category: Ookiku Furikabutte | Big Windup!
Genre: demigirl!mihashi, i have a bunch of ideas for this universe though, i was going to add in some polyamory stuff but i felt it didn't fit in right???, this is just a mess of genderfeels tbqh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 09:52:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5535443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icymuze/pseuds/icymuze
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>explaining something like this is always a challenge</p>
            </blockquote>





	the bluebirds flutter in my chest

**Author's Note:**

> Secret Santa gift for princettemiles on tumblr!! 
> 
> The request was mihashi, genderfeels, and polyamory 
> 
> (the polyamory is in my head RIP i couldn't figure out how to fit it in but i like this verse so i might end up writing more of it later on??) 
> 
> title is taken from the song Break the Sky by The Hush Sound

(oh they want to sing)  
-  
“So… You’re a girl?” Taka is staring at him, looking confused (angry?) and Ren can feel herself sweating and shaking. 

“S-sort of… it’s… weird, I guess…” Ren is crying, and why are there always tears? She starts to wipe away at them; surprisingly gentle hands come up and help her to look Taka in the eye. 

“It’s not weird. It’s you. I mean, I might not get it, but I want to understand. I’ve known you for five years now. I want to keep knowing you.” 

Ren takes a deep breath, and goes back to the very first time.  
-  
“Do you have your pillow? Your bag? Your bunny? Do you remember the home phone number?” Naoe checked over her baby one more time, kneeling down so she could fuss. 

An eight-year-old Ren nodded, smiling wide (and showing off a missing tooth). “Yeah!! Here an’ here an’ here an’ it’s 48-6555-8478!!” 

Naoe laughed, watching Ren bounce up and down in excitement. She knocked on the door, and Ruri and Shuu answered it, yelling in excitement when they saw Ren. Ruri’s mother appeared next, smiling and inviting Naoe in. The kids all ran off, yelling in childish excitement. 

Within a few minutes, Ruri was decorating Ren in makeup. The three kids were all laughing together, and Ren looked proud to be wearing the lipstick (bright red and smeared outside of his lips). “I’m so pretty! Can I be a girl for the rest of the night?” The other two kids just shrugged and went with it, and Ren felt indescribably happy.  
-  
At twelve, Ren knew something was wrong. He (she?) wanted to change things. Wear dresses and makeup and bows and do all sorts of girly things. He knew that it wasn’t like the neighbors down the street, where a girl cut off her hair and cried when she had to wear a dress. Ren didn’t want to, to change his body or anything, he just… Didn’t feel like he was always a boy. 

But he was going to be able to play baseball in middle school, and he didn’t want to give that up either. So he stopped letting Ruri do makeovers on him, and he just focused on baseball.  
-  
The first time Ren really dressed up was when she was seventeen. She went over to Yuu’s house and he helped with makeup and found a dress and even managed to do something with her hair. By the time this makeover was done, Ren felt like a new person. She felt better. Yuu always helped her feel better.  
-  
“S-so… I just… started doing this, and… Yuu helped me find, um, a word… for it…” Ren was looking at her hands (nails done in a pretty light blue) and avoiding eye contact. “D-demigirl, is the word, it’s English, and it’s like… someone who, um, who isn’t… who… I don’t want to, to change anything, I just, I like… being a girl, sometimes…” 

Taka was very quiet next to her; the worst sorts of thoughts came running through Ren’s mind, but it was all put to a stop by a single word. 

“Okay.” 

Ren’s head popped up; Taka was _smiling_ at her and it was going to be okay. He kept talking, voice more gentle than usual. “If you want to be a girl sometimes, then… that’s okay. I might make a mistake, but… I want you to be happy, Ren, okay?” 

Ren beamed over at Taka, taking his hand and lacing their fingers together. “Th-thank you! Um, I want you to be happy too, okay?” She gave Taka a quick peck on the cheek, and everything felt okay.


End file.
